July 2010
2 tags
2 tags
You know you live in Brooklyn when your deli sells diapers. Yay!
3 tags
Boo-ya
My OSI case is being closed.
Rebecca snorting cocaine in Macy’s while pinching Jacket = unfounded.
3 tags
My OSI case update
The lovely OSI worker came over last night. She informed me that my pee has been located. However, whoever has it won’t give the results over the phone and their fax machine isn’t working. Once she has the results she said she will close our case and subsequently she may not see us again. Would you believe that I was actually sad? I gave her a photograph of Jacket and it was clear...
1 tag
1 tag
Start Wearing Purple...da da da da da!
While I’m moving on Friday, Jacket with be at the Gogol Bordello concert with (SCR-cleared) Jason!
Sent: Mon 7/12/2010 12:23 PM To: Info Subject: July 30 concert
Hello OSA, I will be attending the Primus/Gogol Bordello concert on 7/30. About four or five weeks ago I was simply fed up with the They Might Be Giants kids’ music stuff, and introduced my friend’s two year old...
1 tag
With only 2 days left to pack before moving to Brooklyn, I have mismanage my time by memorizing this glorious document that I just found.
If you're into the political bits of foster...
A nice follow-up to this post is here at the New York Times.
As always, confidential insider info is welcome.
1 tag
“I can’t talk right now. I’m at Riker’s [prison] and security...”
– Jacket’s foster agency case worker taking kids to visit their parents- I told her I’d call her back.
Suits Would Burden Foster Parents, Court Rules →
I was wondering if foster parents can be sued…what do you think?
1 tag
A new series: Reader questions
I’m not sure why I didn’t start this sooner… perhaps because it feels too impersonal? Many of you are not just “readers” but have become good friends…
Question #1: Do you recommend any books on foster care?
Answer:
Not yet. Everything I’ve found either bores me to tears or gags me with sentiment. I’m not a foster care expert so I don’t...
1 tag
Some classy quotes from my homestudy
A while back I promised to sacrifice my dignity with some juicy quotes from my Homestudy (interview with a Social Worker) to help ease some readers’ fears about the foster parent application process. As you can tell, these are actually MISquotes derived from a well-meaning Social Worker trying to make sense of my life. I signed-off on most of them to speed the process along because by and...
1 tag
WatchHmm… this posted before I wanted it to. Not to mention that it’s sideways….
Several people have been shocked to learn that Henry is real. So, here he is in living color, snacking on the unreal.
3 tags
1 tag
It can all fall apart so quickly...
I believed people when they said that parenting is really hard but honestly, all of the fuss was a mystery to me until now. It takes just one slip-up out of a thousand strategic moves a day and everything can crumble.
For example, at 5am Jacket wanted up so I pulled her out of the crib and set her free. While lying in bed I could hear her digging in a bag of pretzels and I thought “Fuck...
2 tags
“MOMMY, I Wa PIZZA!”
– Jacket, 6:13am
1 tag
the guess what Jacket wants game?
“I WA SHOW ME!”
ANSWER: Before Jacket had words I would ask her again and again to show me what she wants. Apparently this included picking her up and giving her a first class tour through the kitchen cabinets. “I WA SHOW ME” means that she wants boosted onto the counter so she can plumage.
1 tag
I was just about to write a long stressed-out post about how Jacket was up over a dozen times last night and I don’t understand why. Then I saw the previous photo where Jacket has a package of M&M’s in her hand. I only let her eat 8 pieces but I guess that was enough…
2 tags
For the NYC child welfare professionals
I’m learning that most people in child welfare/foster care are unaware of the resources available to individuals and parents with mental retardation (yes, I’m using the correct, medical term to date). It seems that if a mom has a diagnosis of Mild Mental Retardation it’s viewed as ‘sort of pregnant’. But if someone has Mild Mental Retardation they’ve got a...
3 tags
THINKING ABOUT SNAP'S MOM
Snap’s Mom has my current Manhattan address and I’m wondering how to get my upcoming Brooklyn address to her. Knowing that ‘relapse is part of recovery’, it was always our plan that she could drop-off Snap if things weren’t going well.
Then this happened and my thoughts on the matter remain the same. I’m 85% sure Snap’s Mom is still in rehab. Should...
1 tag
1 tag
an unlove letter to my neighborhood
Dear Neighbors On the Sidewalk who take it upon themselves to discipline a tantruming Jacket,
Please stop.
I’m tired of trying to convince myself of your good intentions. Statements like “Crying is for babies”, “I’m going to throw you into the river if you don’t get up” and “Your mom is going to call the police” are not helpful.
...
1 tag
proud moments in fosterhood
theholdingpattern:
Buttercup went upstairs to use the bathroom. Ten minutes later, she’s still not back. I go to check on her only to find her sitting on the toilet with a magazine.
“I’m reading a story.”
Awesome! Read on, playa.
1 tag
1 tag
Life Jacket
This past weekend Jacket and I went to meet Sara, Thor and Henry at their upstate lake house built by Sara’s grandfather in 1906. If I had more energy I would wax poetically about how idyllic the weekend was. It was every bit of the serene, hands-in-the-mud, childhood fun that I’ve been longing to expose Jacket to. It was icing on the cake to meet kindred foster parents-to-be.
...
2 tags
2 tags
you need a spoon, i mean a fork, no i said a...
Here are the steps I’ve had to take so far in attempt to move Jacket’s daycare from Manhattan to Brooklyn. If you want background, just type “daycare” into this blog’s search engine. Otherwise, marvel…
1. Spoke to daycare director of local ‘network’. No sister networks in Brooklyn. Recommends that I call 311 (best invention-ever) and ask for a...
1 tag
Again!
We had to run down to the deli again for chocolate (I secretly ate most of the other M&M’s) and the clerk gave Jacket a candy bar, banana and chips for free! The guy who makes sandwiches came around the counter and gave her a high five. Then everyone in line cheered and danced to Jacket’s Pee-pee in the potty song.
Such an awesome, awesome moment. I would give my right pinky...
1 tag
Jacket’s law guardian (attorney) quit. She told me at court that she is taking a ‘sabatical’ and going to Westchester to work for a private adoption agency (Westchester being a posh suburban community right outside Manhattan). Two hours later her email bounced back saying “I know longer work at ________”. I think that means Jacket’s case was her last one.
...
3 tags
My fosterhood rubric
I find myself measuring my success at parenting Jacket by the healthiness of her hair. As it grows long and strong, I feel pretty dang proud. Yesterday however, I felt like a total failure because I had to cut a huge chunk of matted mess out. It was completely my fault, I skipped a night of conditioner. I didn’t think it would matter but apparently it was enough to create a monster...
2 tags
“Hey Rebecca, How’s your baby? I got me an Italian one. Six years-old!”
– a Jamaican lady at work who is OUT OF HER MIND. If all 100 staff members voted on who is COMPLETELY MENTAL she would win-hands down. I wasn’t aware that she knew about Jacket, much less that she was considering foster care herself.
1 tag
5:45am- A totally not cool morning greeting
Jacket: WHO'S THAT?!
Me: asleep
WHO'S THAT?!
(awake) What?
(points outside the bedroom) WHO'S THAT?!
Who's WHO?
WHO'S THAT?!
Wait, seriously- is there someone out there? (wondering why the hell I have a yoga mat instead of a baseball bat under my bed)
WHO'S THAT?!
(quietly program 911 into my cell phone)
WHO'S THAT?
(peak out into the dark living room. see no one) FUCKING HELL JACKET, why can't you just say 'good morning' like you used to?!
1 tag
Another odd greeting
This morning it was “I WAA THAT!” to which I kept asking “You want what?” and Jacket would say “THAT!” while pointing at the blank wall. She succeeded in getting me out of bed, to the kitchen, into the cabinets and then she selected an onion. I handed it to her and we both went back to bed.
2 tags
“Seriously, am I being punk’d?”
– Me to the ACS OSI worker when she came over to view and document my pee receipt (thank god I saved it)
1 tag
I promise I'm not making this shit up
You’re not going to believe whose mother-fucking pee (drug test) was lost.
“We are having our last foster care support meeting of the season and we hope to...”
– voicemail message from an “Anchor parent” who organizes the local foster care support group demonstrating why I choose to blog instead. 