I made a grave, grave mistake.

I googled nyc private schools. I went to some of their websites. I clicked admissions. I downloaded applications. I read the essays they want parents to write. And the financial aid forms… I almost started filling them out for Jacket, but if I did, I wouldn’t stop until I completed applications for all 10,001 private schools in the city.

Now I’m WIDE awake totally obsessing about getting Jacket into an excellent private school. Mind you, I went to public school- in fact, I was bussed across the railroad tracks to so-called “bad schools” but I think I got a pretty decent education - a love for learning was instilled in me. I want my own kids to go to public schools, but Jacket- she needs every extra boost she can get to help her break out of the cycles of poverty, violence and substance abuse in her family.

I’m figuring that Jacket’s mom would make the extra effort for a private school (I’ll fill out the applications but there will inevitably be some extra work for her) if the detective’s daughter goes too (they are the same age). The detective is already planning on sending her daughter to a private school so if I could help her get her daughter into a top-tier one, she wouldn’t mind one iota. I think Jacket having a buddy from a similar background (the ‘hood- although their family backgrounds are obviously different) at a ‘rich school’ would be really important. Not to mention, I doubt I’d be able to handle Jacket’s mom myself at a parent-teacher meeting….the detective is going with (whether she knows it or not) so she might as well have her daughter at the same school…and so my scheme continues….

Oh wondrous internet, you know where this is going. I know you have connections. And I know it’s all about connections. Jacket is bright. The detective’s daughter is very bright. They epitomize the diversity such schools seek. Yes, Jacket’s family is going to be a major pain in the ass (not to mention spectacle)- but I’ll be an even more skilled mediator by then.

Oh, glorious, magnificent internet..have I told you how the beige in those flannel pajamas brings out the youthful glow of your cheeks? Mind you, I don’t come completely empty handed. I can do a pretty good trade with some area college contacts… maybe you have a high school senior with a 1.5 and you’re hoping he’ll get in somewhere? Talk to me… in the meantime, start chatting up the powers that be, this HAS to happen.

At least I’m not asking for someone to rig the charter school lottery, yet. ;) And if you can, cause Lord knows you’re probably out there reading this, don’t tell me yet. It would be way, way to tempting to know.

FALL 2013- KINDERGARTEN

Jacket - full financial aid

the daughter of two NYPD detective’s - partial financial aid