laying down the law (well, sort of- much more than ever before)

  • Jacket's mom's text (spelling/grammar corrected): I'm sorry, she has to come with me for Saturday morning, you can have her next Friday, okay?
  • My text: Does that mean she will miss preschool on Friday and swim class on Saturday? I had to pay for both and they were expensive (I should have laid out the costs for her already but didn't get a chance).
  • You can tell them that she will be there next Friday and Saturday, I'm sure they will say okay.
  • Yes, but I won't be refunded. Are there any other days that she will miss? Where does she have to be that is more important than her education? (a bit on the dramatic side I know, just trying get stress the point)
  • No, don't ask for a refund, just tell them she will be there next Friday and Saturday. She's going to her in-law's home.
  • The school won't let us do that. I had to make a commitment. Jacket can't come and go as she pleases to classes.
  • They live far away from here (it's about a 2 hour subway ride).
  • Did you tell them [her family] that Jacket only goes to school one day a week?
  • Yes, the schools are like that (she means pay-as-you-go). I asked myself when you paid and they told me that she can come and go as she pleases.
  • Who did you speak to at the school (I'm 99% sure she didn't call. She didn't even take the pamphlet home that I gave her with all of the school info on it). I signed a contract (but actually, as always- I'm aware of the risk and willing to cut my losses. I'm just trying to make a point to Jacket's mom). I will give you a copy of the contract next time I see you. I paid $XXX a month whether she attends or not.
  • Not that school, another one that she goes to because I pay them only Monday to Wednesday. She goes and I pay.
  • This isn't a daycare, it's a preschool. And swim lessons are only for 8 weeks. I paid for 8 weeks but now she will only get 7 (In the future, I want to bring myself to require her to pay a portion, even if it's just $1- she needs to be making a commitment as well).
  • Okay, but she will be going with you to daycare. She wanted to see her in-laws.
  • I really want you to think about Jacket's future and the importance of her education. I can help, but you have to do your part as well. In the future, Fridays and Saturday mornings need to be a priority. These are the days you chose. Appointments and family visits need to be scheduled on other days.
  • Yes, I know, she goes to school for 3 days where I live (She's fibbing- she probably feels backed into a corner). She loves school and she asks all the time so I had to put her in.
  • --I wait a few minutes to slow down our conversation--
  • Okay, I am sorry. You're right.
  • Thanks. Really think about it. The better the school the more strict it is (not necessarily, but Jacket's mom is such a concrete thinker, I'm trying to stretch her thoughts the other direction). Jacket could really be a judge or a lawyer (some dreams Jacket's mom has come up with for Jacket's future) or anything she wants one day but it will require that she stay ahead in her education. And when she's ahead, her self-esteem will be high and she will do amazing things.
  • You're right, but she's in school (I know she's not because she doesn't have the right medical forms. I've tried to give my copies to her but she doesn't understand and refuses).

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19 Notes

  1. sitnexttolynn said: I don’t know how you do it. Patience of a saint, you have.
  2. kmnml said: Ugh, so upsetting. Good for you for standing your ground.
  3. hopelesslydevotedtolove said: This must be so frustrating. Looking out for what is best for a child when her own mother can’t even put the child ahead of herself or others.
  4. sweetcarolinealine said: I know it’s just preschool, but if she is a higher risk CPS should be doing something about this. I know it would put a strain on your relationship with her Mom, but they need to be informed of this. I mean, why doesn’t she just take the forms?
  5. thepinksuperhero said: Look at Jacket, one day it’s preschool, the next, she has in-laws! They grow up so fast ;)
  6. addelburgh said: So frustrating. :(
  7. fosterhood posted this