Your comments got me thinking- Do the agencies who accept single foster parents, but not unmarried couples, expect the single person to be celibate? And if not, how do they address that? Wouldn’t it be better to have a consistent guy (or girl) ‘on the books’ with a background check as opposed to unknown adults hanging around?
Maybe we’re all most comfortable with the little old lady foster mom (or grandma really) image because we assume she’s done having sex? But then, I witnessed Snap’s judge raise questions about his current foster mom being too old to adopt him. So it seems that the grandma types aren’t a good match for all of the kids…
Fortunately, my agency was very frank about being single, fostering and <gasp> the possibility of getting it on. This frankness allowed me to be comfortable speaking up straight away when I started dating Brian. The policy was really simple, if anyone starts spending the night at your home on a regular basis, let us know so we can check them out. Covers all the bases, right? Uncle Albert wants to move into town and crash on the couch for a few months? Get him screened. My friend Hiro is coming in from Japan for 3 days, that’s okay.
Anyway, not even sure where I’m going with this now. In general, I think it’s all about the homestudy. A good homestudy (as mine was) involves a licensed social worker speaking with prospective foster parents at length about their families strengths and weaknesses.
What’s out there in the policy making world? Anything suggested from the bigger research institutes? Any single foster parents dare to share how dating has worked for them?
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- ohbabybird said: I have yet to date anyone while fostering but I can’t see my agency caring at all. I would want to bring her to meet them cause they are so cool anyways. And with Doc sleeping in my room I’m sure he will be asleep when sex takes place in his crib.
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